I was listening to the Tim Ferris podcast (Tim Ferris of the 4 Hour Work Week fame), and in episode 494, Tim talked jointly with Michael Phelps and Grant Hackett. Although I’m from the swimming and water polo world, I had never realised that although huge rivals in the pool are very close, almost like brothers. It was a fascinating insight into their personalities. It covered multiple areas, including most notably, carrying the weight of success, their struggles with mental illness and how they deal with life post their athletic careers. As Tim Ferris often does, he asks his guests to choose a book that affects them. Grant Hackett mentioned the Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck by Mark Manson. So I thought I’d follow along by adding a book and comments each week. The first of which is Mark Manson’s “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck.”   The Key Message of the Book: We try to do too much in life, and this leads to stress and unhappiness. Each of us needs to learn to stop “giving a f*ck” and about the things causing us pain. What do you want to really care about and develop a more constructive approach to work, love and life itself? Forget FOMO (fear of missing out) and learn to say NO.   Summary of Learnings: – What is in it for me? Learn to focus on the important things in life: and screw the rest. – Whatever you do in life, it will be a struggle, so you need to find the struggle that’s right for you. – Suffering can lead to great things, but if you don’t have the right values, you’ll never be happy. – Many people tend to focus on ‘shitty’ values, so it’s important to find some good ones to believe in. – Sometimes we feel like victims’, but positive change only happens when you take full responsibility for your life. – We often flee when our identity is threatened, but Buddhism can help; it helps to recognise the fake concepts in life. – Romantic love can be destructive unless we learn to control it. – Humans are terrified of death, and so they tried to live on beyond it.   Quotes: – Not giving a f**k does not mean being different. It means being comfortable with being different. – Don’t just sit there. Do something. The answers will follow. – Life is essentially an endless series of problems. The solution to one problem is merely the creation of another.   Photo credit: Tian Ming Goh (IG: @goh_tm)